I Woke Up Tired.
I read My Last Diary Post That Had An Upteen Amount of Mistakes featured in it.
We must've uttered More Cuss Words 2day than Ever Before.
Frustrated. Tired. Angry. Disappointed. Regretful. Played. Disrespected. All Emotions felt at Some Point in Time Today.
We're Tha most open of people you'll ever find. Always Thinking in terms of Laughs and Smiling Faces.
But we've never been through a Period of Time Such as This.
Everything has 'Felt' bolted Shut in our Life. And I just Wonder...'Why?'
What have I done or didn't do for things and people not to open up to us.
I'm Always That "Life of Tha Party" person, just because I think Life can be Cool and special and Uniquely Enjoyable.
But it's like...It's Tough. Certain People Who I Would Gladly Enjoy Their Presence like Shut Their Hearts to Me...or Once Again...Use Me just for Attention I guess.
I'm just a Kid Too.
But it kinda gets old...Wherever I go, it feels like I'm this Big 'Celebrity' of sorts, which can be embarrassing...Then When You...
At Tha J-O-B Had a Lengthy Discussion about Love, Dating...True Beauty, it was refreshing.
But I told one of Tha Women, I'm Holding on for Dear Life...Cuz I'm Tired. FLAT OUT TIRED.
We're a One of A Kind Person. People Share that with us a lot. Tell us that we're not made just for Anybody...Or How We're Gonna Make Some Gurl Tha 'Luckiest Gal on Earth' Or How We're 'Tha Nicest Person I've Ever Met'.
One Time Some Gurl was like...'Well Nobody is Perfect...Except Austin!' I Cringed Tightly When I heard that. I'm Flattered About Tha Encouraging Comments and Compliments, but our life is a Trip.
I Have 2 Be On...24/7.
As Soon as I walk out Our South Beach Pad, I never know literally who I'm gonna run into. So many times Absolute Complete Strangers just Come and Talk 2 Me About Life or Their Struggles of What They Are Going Through. I try 2 Be a Listening Ear. But I truly wonder Why These Guys or Gals Keep Chosing Me as Their Voice of Reason...And I don't Even Know Them.
A Few Weeks ago I was Headed 2 Tha Airport on Tha Bus from South Beach. This guy jumps on off of 41st Street and made his way to Tha Back, Where I was Sitting. He first asked 2 use my phone, which I was hesitant on cuz my LA Area Code is Precious 2 My Heart. But I felt a need. 2 make a long story short, he just left Tha Hospital where he felt like he was being Blackballed, and Tha Doctors and Nurses Wanted Him to Commit Suicide and Kill Himself. So He's telling me all this...I'm trying 2 Encourage Him about Life, and U know What he Told Me...
"Man...You Saved My Life!"
It's amazing when someone tells you that from their heart. But the people that are placed in our lives...
One time I was in Tha K-mart off of Biscayne Boulevard about 2 prepare to wash my car. In the checkout line was a gentleman in a Wheelchair. U know sometimes u never know if u should ask if they need help or what not. He Paid. I paid. Then as I walk behind him, I'm like, 'Do You Need Some Help?' He Said...'Yeah'. I asked, 'Where He Lived?' He said, "South Beach." So for some strange reason I asked, 'Do U Need A Ride?' And Tha Glow on His Face just Lit Up! Next thing I know it, Tha both of us are Heading to my Car. He's in A Wheelchair. I'm particular about my car, but in Tha name of Helping Somebody out, Who Cares. So I cut on the ignition So I Could Drop Tha Soft Top into a Convertible. His Wheelchair was Heavy, but I Heeved Hoed it in Tha Backseat. Did u know we spent Tha Entire Afternoon together. He said he hadn't rode in a Car for like 10 years...Y'all Didn't Catch that...10 Years!! And I complain...
He told me he was Homeless and forced to sleep outside one of the Fast Food joints here in the beach. We riding around town talking about Homelessness (Which is My Beauty Pagent Issue of Choice)...Love...His Family That left him cuz He Dated a White Gurl and They Thought He Sold Out...Talked About Life, Success, Porn, Strip Clubs, Smoking, His Health, How Miami treats Homeless People...it was incredible how that day turned out. All because we simply asked if he needed help.
But it's amazing Tha people who cross my paths...From Women Who Sell Their Bodies For Sex to People on Tha Street asking for Directions...Like they seek us Out.
I want 2 Make a Big Dent in This World...That's Why Our Name is 'Galaxia'. It fits Perfectly for who we are. I just want people to be happy.
That's why my last episode with this Beauty of a Gurl...It Hurts, it Hurts. I Won't Disrespect Her and Go into Details but I First Saw Her at An Airport. She now knows I'm talking about her. I was Totally Done With Gurls and After Some Time had Passed, I just happen to Turn and I Almost Couldn't Believe My Eyes. Like it was as if a 'Heavenly Spotlight' was Shining on Her. And it went Waaaay Past Her Physical Beauty, but There Was and Is Just Something Special About Her. And I know that to be true. It was A Confidence and Sexy a Swagger That just Orbited Her As She Talked. Just to see her Hands Move and Tha Nodding of Her Head was Borderline Poetry in Motion itself.
But Tha Thought That Ran through my Mind Was One...Be Patient.
And Two...I Really Want 2 Know This Gurl.
Like Not Sleep With Her or Try 2 'Bang' her...Honestly Know Her Personality and Spirit.
I'm always around Attractive Gurls it seems, but There was This Calmness That I Felt Within Me. Not a Lust like 'I Gotta Have Her...I Gotta Have Her!'...Just A Legit Peace That I never Felt In Tha Presence of a Gurl Before.
Maybe It Was From Her.
Tha Story has So Many Twists and Turns that She Doesn't Even know About...Until Now...
Like...How My Bus From Indiana to the Airport was actually Late by about 15 Minutes. So if it was on time, I would not have seen her likely.
Or How For Some Reason I Actually Chose That Flight 3pm back to Miami. Usually I ALWAYS chose Tha Final Flight Out That Sunday Night because I want to Maximize as Much time as Possible to spend with My Family, but...Since I missed a Flight out New Year's Eve due to Inclement Weather I Didn't want to Miss My Flight so I Chose the flight with Two Other Options Behind it at like 4pm and 7pm just in case.
Which brings me to Another Twist of Fate...The Security Checkout Line was At An All-Time Worse. I left to speak to an American Airlines Rep at Their Front Desk. I told her I was gonna miss my flight cuz of Tha Holdup at Security. She Literally gave me Tha option to be on 'Standby' for the next flight. It was a Serious Option too because the flight got pushed back to like 3:13 pm, but I was 4 Long Rows back with Security and Now Lost my Place Out of Line. I thought, 'What if I said Book Me For Stand By?'
Or...
What if this kind TSA Gal in a White Blouse wasn't So Nice to literally Allow me to cut like 75 People in the Security Checkpoint line, and Put me Right next in line...No Hassle, No Fuss...She just walked up like, 'He's Next.' I hand over my Florida ID, Homeboy Scans it, and Now I'm on my Way.
But in my Heart I know She's a Unique Combination of Beauty and Brains. But I'm not getting a Chance to know her. Not sure if...I don't know what's going on. But with Her as with Everyone Who meets Me...I'm about jokes and Wanting u to smile.
Like...
People may see my 'Young Hollywood' style, or Look at our body...Or That I live 3 blocks from Tha ocean or That we Got Money or That We Don't believe in Age or Post 'Goofy' Pics on Instagram and Think This or That...
But I'm not like these other dudes. I can have Tha same amount of Fun Talking While Sitting underneath A Coconut Tree as I Can Playing Naked Twister in Bed Unloosing Your Bra So I Can See Your Coconuts! Or Playing Board Games or Sharing Funky Childhood Stories...Like 'Fun' comes in a variety of ways for me. More than most who only think Getting Plastered or Getting High is Tha only way 2 a 'Miami Night'. No...
I luv 2 Party and Definitely Luv to Dance, I mean All Weekend I was in my place working on Some Serious Dance Moves, I'm Truly ready 2 Bust Them Out at Any Notice!
But I just don't want any girls to be intimidated or afraid or scared to be themselves around us. I talk about Love, but I ain't ready 2 get Married. May not even want a Relationship right now. These stories I share aren't from me looking for Gurls to add 2 Tha List...They literally happen to us Over and Over Again like a Movie. Somehow we always Attract Beautiful Gurls to us...
Nuthing Stable though.
So when People say Nice Things, or Strangers Tell You as You are Stuck in Traffic on your Vespa...
'One Day You're Gonna Be a Millionaire .'
Or...
'You're Gonna Make it I Can See It In Your Eyes.'
If Everybody Else sees that I just a Silly Lad who wants 2 Change Tha World and Show Luv and Fun, then Why Are Some Tha Gurls I'd like 2 Know So Hesitant about knowing Us As Well?
It's Perplexing and Why I've Said that All I've gone through has prepared me for ThatbOne Gurl Who wants That Ultimate Luv Experience. And I have Willingly yet Many Times Begrudgingly Endured through Tha All Tha Drama and Lies because I Hope against Hope That all I've been Through Has Molded Me 2 Become Somebody's Dream Come True. And I won't be Smothering...Won't be Controlling or Jealous...And I won't hold Anything Back Either. I view Relationships As Dating Ur Homie. I'm a Kid so...One Can Only Imagine Being With us On a Consistent Basis.
It Would Be a Fun Circus, believe You That.
Today was a First, writing about a Girl who I admire, even though I don't truly know her Yet...in Real-Time. A First and only honor. But 'Miss YSL' Continue to be You, Have Fun Always, and I Hope I get 2
Enjoy Ur Company Some Day. If u need a Laugh, You know Where 2 Find Me Homegurl.
Yep. Yep. Yep.
That's it. My Heart poured once again Upon This Blank Canvas.
I'm just going back to the Ol' Me of just enjoying life. I was Seriously Down Earlier Cuz I had that 'Why is Life So Hard?' Mindset. But...No Pain, No Gain.
Sometimes if U want Tha Best, U must Endure Tha Hardest Tests.
My Day Will Come.
And By What I've Experienced...
My Time is Now..
Here.
Bye! With Smooches!
Galaxia.
No comments:
Post a Comment