Drip Drop!

What a Day...What a Day...What A Day!! There's So much going on In Our Life, That I almost Feel Tha Need 2 Get Drunk!!

Lots of Good Stuff...Our Life Has Completely Changed and When Tha Timing is Right I'll Go into It...It's Beginning 2 Rock Like Punk.

Somewhere in Tha Galaxy Though, I Honestly Feel like Tha Frequency is Off...Like Somebody May be Going Through Something On Tha Low...And May Feel Stuck in Some Kind of James Brown Funk.

Just Gonna Let Tha Diary Write Itself on This Friday Afternoon...No Idea Where This is Gonna be going...We're Gonna Just Let go of Tha Junk.

Has Anybody Woke up with Tha Feeling That It's Gonna Be a Loooooooong Day? And u Haven't even Let Tha Toothpaste Touch Tha Toothbrush!

U Roll Outta Bed Like Mr. Potato Head, bumping into Everything Possible in Tha Blackness of AM...Already upset That Tha Sped Up Sound of Tha Alarm Clock Woke u Up in a Rush.

Then You Get into Tha Shower, and As Soon as u get in, U Drop Tha Soap...Tha Last Time u Cleaned Ur Bath Was When Ashton was With Demi...Cassie Hadn't Met Diddy...So u a Tad Leery 2 Bend Down 2 Touch.

After Picking Up Tha Soap and Blowing on it Like Steamin' Dunkin' Donuts Coffee...Thoughts Hit you Wishing There Were 364 Days instead of 365 in a Year...Everything Feels Wrong From ur Head 2 Ur Toosh.

And Us Miamians Know...If Ur Having A Bad Day Before U Even Left Tha a Crib, Just Wait Until U Step Outside...You Feel as if Ur About 2 Enter a Sci-Fi Horror With a Scary Glow.

First Off, Especially Here in South Beach, U See Somebody Tried 2 Squeeze Their Luxurious SUV into a 2 Ft. Opening on Tha Street...And Of Course, They Are Inches Away From Ur Bumper...Noooo!!!

And U See it a New Kidz On A Block away...Uttering 2 Yourself...'I Hope They Didn't Hit My Car...I Hope a They Didn't Hit My Car.' Speaking So Fast, Giving Ur Best Imitation Tha Eminem Show.

The Closer U Get 2 Ur Ride, Tha More Upset u Get cuz They Done Dinged Up Ur Ride...And it Has Even been Three Days Since u Pulled it Off Tha Showroom Floor With That Big Red Bow.

But...U Gotta Get To Work, And U don't know What's Worse...Tha Crazy Drivers That act Like Tha World is Literally About 2 Come 2 an End Right after Tha Beauties of Despierta América! Say Adiós at Ten.

Or That You Hit Every. Single. Light. You Think about Going Speed Racer and Just Fly Through...But Then U See Paparazzi Style Flashbulbs Go Off From Every Which A Way...Ready 2 Nail u For Not Stopping and Tha Other 7 Deadly Sins.

So u got People in Tha Fast Lane of Tha Left Going Waaayyy Below Tha Speed Limit...Which Leads To To Practice Yoga Breathing Exercises Right As Ur Driving...In Ur Calmest Voice Whispering...'Out...In.'

You Want 2 Close Ur Eyes as Well, But U Know U'll Either Crash or Go to Sleep...In Either Order...Ur Entire Day Is In Tha Tubes...U ain't Even Punched Tha Clock yet...All This Before It Really Even Begins!

Trust Me...Been There Too Many Times Where it Just Feels Like Life is Just Picking on You...Like Tha Heavens are Playing Spend Tha Bottle and Somebody's Foot Intentionally Stuck out So You Get Tha Death of Kiss.

It's All Good When it Samantha Who's Tha Head Cheerleader, Hottest Gurl in School...Tha One Who When Ur Friend Said She Was More Kourtney Than Kylie U Literally Began 2 Muster up a Fist!

But Somehow up got Stuck With Tha Gurl Who Has given U Wet Kisses on Tha Cheek Since 2nd Grade...And There's No way Outta This One...No Hall Monitor...No Bell 2 Sound 2 Indicate...Dismiss.

So u Shyly Have 2 Follow Homegurl to That Dark Closet filled With Socks and Dirty Shoes...Hoping This Experience Will a Turn From A Nightmare on Sesame Street 2 A Dream Come True By Make-A-Wish!

It Ain't fun When Ur in Tha Midst of One of Life's Storms...Ok, Quick Story.

Now, I shouldn't Even Tell This Story...Because it's Super Embrassing...Like SUPER...but It was One of Tha Worse Days of My Life...U don't know now, but Soon You'll See Why.

Sure after I share All This Madness...Every Gurl From High School and College Up...Will Refuse to Date Me...Which Means I'll Have 2 Send My Talent Scouts 2 Tha Levels of Junior High.

Things Happen, That's Life, Sometimes Tha Best Thing You Can Do is Just Take Tha Raindrops as They Fall on Ur Head..And Hope Tha Pounding Stops Long Enough for u To Dry.

Sometimes it's a Few Minutes...Other Times it's Several Days or Hours...But it Does Come 2 An Arousing Halt...Tha Giddiness That It's Over amazes U Forget U Even Had Tears in Ur Eyes.

Oh...How I Hope My Gurlfriend To Be Isn't Reading This...Cuz This is...Bad.

(Huge Blow!)

So I'm an Indiana Boy, Through and Through...From Tha Land of Corn and Hoops...Tha Pace is So Much Slower Than it Is On This Worldwind of Tha East Coast.

Folks Down Here Wake Up To Stylish Mimosas and NON All-U-Can Eat Brunches...Heck up North, I Thought I was Living Like One of Tha Hiltons if Moms gave us Grape Jelly over 2 Slices of Toast!

I'm from Michigan City, which is Very Close to Chicago, Illinois...That was Like a Second Home 2 Me and Tha Fam...So Many Great Times...From Cubs Games on Rooftops 2 Shopping on Michigan Avenue From Pillar to Post.

I'm a Big City Type of Guy, With Global Hostile Takeover Dreams...I mean I want 2 Make a Impact on Pop Culture Yet Never Disappear...So In Some But Not All Ways...I Want 2 Be Like Casper Tha Friendly Ghost.

I've Always Had A Thing For Fashion...Even as a Kid I remember Flipping Through GQ Magazines Reading about Articles and Looking At Tha Ads That Allowed Me 2 Envision My Future Life of Wealth.

But Also I had and Still Had A Keen Interest in Tha Modeling Industry...It Wasn't Just Tha Pretty Gurls but Honestly it was Something That I just Felt. 

I grew up in Tha Golden age of Supermodels...Tha Cindys...Naomi's...Claudia's...Linda's...I still Have a MEGA Crush on Niki Taylor...When I heard She Lives in Here South Florida My Heart Almost Did Melt!

But Tha Ups and Downs of Tha Industry...Tha Rejections...Unrealistic Expectations Put on Tha a Guys and Gals...Along with Fashion and Just Enjoying Being Beautiful...That Totally Sounds Snobby...But These Were Cards I wanted 2 Be Dealt.

Getting Into Tha Industry...Not only as a Face, but as Someone in Tha Offices of Tha Agency is Very...Very...Very Hard...It's A Tight Knit Family almost Junior Mafia Style...Everybody Knows Everybody All Around.

Plus, Tha Cool Peeps who Have Those Gigs Rarely Ever Leave...Usually Being Someone Having An 'Unprofessional' Relationship With a Talent or...If One Goes Six Feet Underground.

I still Remember Sending Résumés To New York...LA...Dallas...Toronto...Here in Miami...Tha List was Crazy...Printing Envelopes 2 Look Cityboy not Countryboy...A Response I Barely Found.

I Did Nail an Internship (My First but Not My Last One) with This Small Agency up in Chicago...It wasn't Like FORD or Elite but it Got My Foot In Tha Door...Sometimes it's just refreshing 2 Know Opportunity Heard Your Knocking Sound.

I got Stories Galore...I worked for a Man and a Woman...As I Look Back 2nite, it was Hilarious! Everyday was Material 2 Add To My Book...That is Coming 2 A Bookstore Near You.

But I gotta Say something About My Gurl...I was Still a Tenderoni, and New 2 Tha Industry but This Woman Was FINE...She Was Like Ageless...And I sometimes Didn't Know What 2 Do.

She Had Super Long Blond Hair...Her Body Still Today Might Be Tha Best I've Seen in How Fit Yet Curvy She Was...She Dressed Super Young, but Has Been Around...On a Scale of 10 she was Bordering Tha 5 X 2.

What I loved About her was She Was a Crazy! U know those Women who are Crazy in Tha 'Ha Ha' or 'Let's Bust This Chick's Car Windows Out!' Sense?! No...This Woman Was Looney, and I Loved It..Who Knew!!

So I will be Doing my Tasks For Tha Day, Making Phone Calls or Whatever, and She would Sit Next To Me...And Sometimes I would Get a Feeling Like, I'm a Friendly Bump in Tha Knees or a Touch Away From It Going Down.

That was My Gurl, and I tried Not To Read into Too a Much but...I think I coulda and SHOULDA...This One time She Was Throwing a Fashion a Show and Wanted To put me In It...Fa Sure! I'll be Tha Toast of Chi-Town!

So after I was told That...I went Home and Went To my Bathroom and Began to Shave My Chest! No Lie...Pops Was Like, 'What Are U Doing???' I was Taking My Debut Serious Yo! Like a Bride Choosing her Gown.

As I was Putting Tha a Razor to my Chest I thought Like, 'How Do Gurls do This Stuff 2 Their Legs...Armpits...and Bush?' That's when I knew That Being That Top Notch Chick in Travis Porter's 'Ayy Ladies' Takes a Workload by Tha Pounds.

Now...So This One Day Occurred, and it Had 2 Be Something in Tha Air Because I was Truly Cursed By Fate.

From My Indiana Home 2 Tha Chi...Tha Drive is About an Hour and 20-30 Minutes. It all Depends on Traffic and Tha Movement Through Those Toll Gates.

I got up Early and Got Swagged Out just like Any Other Day, Threw on My Suit Coat with Slacks, and I was out Tha Door looking Like I was Going on My First Date.

Everything Was Kosher as a Hot Dog until I got Further Up Tha Road...And Then All Heck Began 2 Break Loose in My mind...Right There on Tha Interstate.

Tha Closer I got to Work, Tha Worst Thought That Can Enter a Ur a Mind When Ur Dealing With Crazy Mad Traffic and Trying 2 Go 2 a Work on a Time...'I Think I gotta Go 2 Tha Bathroom.'

Once u Hear That in Ur Head, U Then Do Any and Everything 2 Get 2 Tha Chapel on Time...Except Traffic is a Female Dog, So Got Absolutely No Place to Go 'Zoom Zoom!'

I know Somebody knows What I'm Talking About! Then u Try Not 2 Think About it...U Cut Off Tha Radio just In Case They Play TLC's "Waterfalls" or Fat Joe aka Joey Crack's "Make it Rain" Remix that will Definitely Force a Day of Gloom.

Under These Extreme Circumstances U Have to...HAVE TO go Into Straight Jedi Knight Mode Where Ur Entire Purpose of Being is To Make it 2 Work without Puddles in Ur Shoes, Which Will Spell Doom.

But Of Course, Me Having an Combined Ego of Steve Jobs and Stewie From Family Guy, believes I can Make it...Especially Since I just got off Tha Exit so I'm Close.

To my Left I pass Tha a Rock 'N Roll Mickey D's So I know I'm into Downtown Chicago...I'm a Few Streets over from Tha Skyscraper where Tha Offices are, and I'm Mediating while Holding with Every Strength and Dose.

Bet!! Now Traffic Stunk, but No need 2 Think about it...I see Tha Entrance 2 Tha Parking Garage, I Busted Through like Dale Earnhardt Jr., Feeling Sorta Relieved That I'm Gonna Make it In by Tha Tip of My Nose.

But Then...OH NO!!! What In Tha Bloody A???!! I can't Find a Parking Space...Nowhere, And Everyine whose been in this Position Knows Once U Smell Victory and Have to 'Re-Up' Ur Hold Position, Tha Second Time Is Worse, This I Know!

I'm going Speeding Up and Down Every Level of This Parking Garage, Like A Game of Chutes and Ladders, Looking For a That One Magical Spot.

After all Tha Torture, We finally Found One...I don't Think I even Grabbed My Folder, I Slammed my Car Door and Sprinted To Tha Elevator with My Knees Knocking Trying to Hold in My Little Tea Pot.

Tha Doors Finally Opened, I busted In and Throw My Fingers on Tha Floor Button, which was High...And....And...I Can Sense a Tingle About 2 Drip...And This Was Gonna Be a Big Drip Drop!!!

Next Thing I Know it, In Tha Middle of The Elevator I Put Both Of My Hands, Cuz I need To...On My Spaceship Below and Prepare For An Unwelcome 'Lift Off' That I could Hold in No Longer...

All I Remeber is This Warm Feeling Beginning To Creep Down All Tha Way Down My Left Leg...And Just Like Making Out With a Playmate of Tha Year I was Thinking, 'This Cannot Be Happening To Me??!!'

Oh Yes It Can...Then I felt This Expression Come upon My Face, that Looked Almost Similar To that Silly Burger King Mascot that Had that Blank and Eerie Grin on His Face...How Could This Be.

I look Down And My Crotch And Pants Look Flooded, They Smell Like a 64 oz. Ghetto Lemonade...And I'm About 2 Walk into This Agency like a Reject from Charlie Brown's Peanuts Gang...This Day I Did Not Want 2 See.

I had No Idea What 2 Do...I'm an Intern so This will Have My Name Smeared All Over Town...So I did What any Other Young Playa Would Do..lI Walked in That Bad Bit Like Nuthing Happened! Ha ha! Like a Straight OG!!!

Me and My Urine Stained Pants Sat Down at Our Desk...Everything I Did That Day Was Favoring My Right Side, Since That Was My 'Dry' Side and Walked around Tha Office like a Number 2 Pencil!!

That Ish' was Crazy...But Nobody Knew!! After encountering A Day like That One Totally Tosses away Every Single Stencil.

That was Tha Most Embrassing Thing EVER...I've Never Shared With So Many People That Story...Life is Buck Wild Dude...Like One Big Seesaw.

My Swag is Always on a Max, and I'm Extra Particular about Tha Tiny Details Surrounding How I look or Our Image...But Since I'm Still a Goofy Kid, I must Admit That was Tha Day...

Where "Pop!!"... Went Tha Weasel!!

Continue 2 Push...Life's Rain only Brings Rainstorms. And Even in Our Toughest, Craziest or Even Most Embarrassing Moments, We Can Still Find A Laugh. It Makes it a Whole Lot Better.

Love and U Will Be Loved.

Toddles!!!

Galaxia!