This Stupid Thang...Is It Morning Already? Seems Like I Just Went To Sleep.
What Time is It? 8:18am. Oh Shoot...I'm Supposed 2 Be a Work, Now I'm In Knee Deep.
Whatever...Was It Worth It? Fudge Yeah, It Was...Wait, I'm Not Home am I...Where Did I Creep?
Whose Condo am I In? 2 Early For all These Questions...Thoughts Jumping Up and Down With Great Leaps.
All I Remember is Me Going Out With Tha Gurls To This Hot Club...Where All Tha Guys Got Tha Dough.
Whenever Me and Tha Gurls Hit These Miami Streets, Cameras Flash Like a Fall Runway Show.
Yeah, I Got 200,000 Followers on Instagrams, and after Tha Outfit I Wore Last Night, That's Sure 2 Grow.
This Tight Betsy Johnson Number, Hugging My Curves In All Tha Right Places...My Ears Have Never Heard a 'No.'
Tha Music Was Poppin' as Usual, Banging Some Old School Dance Tunes like "Poison" Mixed In With Some Aerosmith.
I'm Usually All About Tha Hip Hop Nowadays...U Know Jeezy, Future, I Like Juicy J When I'm Sipping on A Fifth.
All These Guys Hitting on Us...I Mean Like "I Lost My Number, Can I Have Yours?" is Gonna Work? Please...Be Gone U Piece of Filth!
I Like Men Who Work a Tad Bit Harder To Get Me...I'm A Fantasy...Bomb Personality, UM Grad Smarts, A South American Babe With Hair as Silk.
Yeah, I Laugh At What Guys Do To Be With Me, It's Hilarious...
One Time I Was at This Bar in Wisconsin and This Guy Literally Got Down On One Knee and Offered Me His Farmer's Hat.
His Pickup Line Was..."I Have Every Animal On My Farm Down Tha Street, But I Must Admit I've Never Seen a Sexier Fat Cat."
I was Like, 'Excuse Me?'...With My Mind Thinking Upon How I Can Knock Old McDonald Out With One Punch...Those Morning Boxing Classes Have Taught Me That.
Instead, My Homegurl Dragged Me Away, With Me Shaking My Toosh 3-0-5 Style...I Only Date Men Who are Tall...But Are Boys When They Lay Flat.
Where Am I? I Look Around...This is A Great View of Tha Miami Skyline...Yeah, I've Woken Up To Some Hot Pad In Tha M-I.A.
Brickell Key Condos...Coral Gables Mansions...Trust Me, I've Laid it Down So Good That These Guys Just Offer Me a Key.
It Gets Kinda Hazy Though When They Are Married...I'm Half Brazilian and Half Columbian...So I'm A Freak By Nature...Yet, I'm Hesitant To Get Down With Tha Menage-A-Three!
Mean If Ur a Wall Street Hot Shot, Who's Down Here To Party Off Ur Stock Bonuses...Then Maybe We Can Talk...I Mean Tha First Gurl I Kissed Was...Katy Perry!
Everything is So White in Here...He Must Be From Europe...I Tend To Gravitate To Those Future Heirs of Vodka Empires, Design Museums...They Know Hot To Treat a Chica.
They Fly Over To Party Tha Night Away, and In Tha Day Give Me Cash To Shop At Tha Shops..."Go Buy Urself Some Louboutin's"...I Don't Even Have To Think-a!
This One "Prince" as He Called Himself, Kept Inviting Me To His Yacht Up In Palm Beach To Just "Be You" For a Party...Saying He Told His Friends He Met Tha Ultimate Nica.
I Told Him, 'I'm Not From Nicaragua, First Off...Eww!'...I Need To Stick To Hot Yankees Only...Like That One Gurl Kelly....Or Was Her First Name Minka?
I'm Walking Around Here So Naked...Agent Prova-ca...Pro-Vacour...I Don't Even Know How To Pronounce Tha Brand, All I Know Is Their Lingerie Is Sure To Get Me Laid.
Where's My Bra? My Lucky Color of Green...Huh...U Know U Don't See Green Bras Like You Used To, Tha Market has Gone Down...Ha Ha! I Totally Should Be a Stylist...I Would Be Getting So PAID!
But Not Like I Am Now Though...Oh, My Boobies...I Didn't Even Have To Pay For Them, So Na-Tour-Ral...No Wonder Gurls Hate On Me For Being Besties With David Guetta and Kaskade.
I Work Hard To Maintain My Body...My Body is My Work...I Never Befriend Those Gurls Who Say That "Beauty Always Fades".
Yeah Right? I Need To Give Them Tha Number To My Grandmommy or Abuelita...She Raised Me To Be A Lady Exactly From Day One.
My Madre Told Me That When I Was Born, I Had Everythang I Would Need In Life...A Baby Chanel Bag, Red Lipstick Gloss, and Small One Shot BB Gun.
So I Would Become a Fashion Icon...Be Able To Get Anything I Want From a Man...And If Any of These Chicks Get Chongalicious On Me...I Can Be Like, 'Make U Move, Hun!'
(Snap! Snap!) Nun-Uhn...I Don't Play...Now I Need To Find My Shoes...They are My Favorite Pair...Straight Gucci...My Legs Look So Right In Them...Automatic Night of Fun!
There Not There...Maybe They Are Over By The Night Stand...(BeepBeep.) Yeay...A Text...Man, Not This Guy Again...He Keeps On Bugging Me.
Whatever...Where are My Heels? There They Are...This Guy Has a Fridge Next To His Bed?! I Think I've Hit Tha Jackpot on This One...What's Inside...I Gotta See.
Gatorade....Smirnoff Ice...Like Totally Lame...He Don't Have No Wine or Even Some Ciroc In Here...He Needs To Be Prepared If He Wants To Entertain a Lady.
Ok, This Guy Is Totally Weird...On Top are Some Open Packs of Condoms and a CD Case Sans Tha CD...Oh, Please Don't Tell Me That Last Night I Got Busy While Listening To Some Slim Shady!
Totally Getting Freaked Out...These Heels.....Ehhh...There...There We Go...He Does Have Some Nice Art on Tha Walls...A Gurl of Any Taste Always like Some Andy Warhol.
Still Trying To Figure Out About How Last Night I Ended Up in This Apartment...Guess Like Jaime Foxx, I Need To Blame It on Tha Alcohol.
I Remember Meeting Some Marlins at Tha Place Where We Were at...I Usually Don't Date Baseball Players Cuz Let's Be Honest I'm Not Waiting 9 Innings Before You Hit Ur Long Ball!
For Giancarlo Staton I Would, But For Anybody Else U Gotta Be Kidding Me...I Won't Even Say 'Hi' To You If U Don't Have U Jersey Selling at Tha Mall.
My Dress...My Dress...But Who Else Came Up To Me and My Gurls...I Recall me Getting Into an Argument With My Gal Elise, Cuz She Talks About How There's No Good Guys In Miami.
She's Tha One Out of Tha Bunch, Who's Super Hot and Along With Me Has Smarts...Yet No Awesome Guys Approach Her Cuz She Has This Aura of "U Can't Get Me."
When Inside I Know She's Just a Sexy Mama Who Wants a Normal Life of Great Hubby, Super Job, and To Have Some Kids 2 Start a Family.
That's My Gurl There...I Tell Her To Be Patient and Tha Right Guy Will Come...But She's Fed Up...She Wishes She Was More of a Bad Gurl...With Tats, and a 'Whatever' Attitude...And A Guy With a Face on TV.
This Dress is a Showstopper...I Don't even Want To put This Thang Back On, but I Have To...Or Tha Concierge Downstairs Gonna Think That I Got Paid For My Work.
But She Has To Just Hang in There...Hey, Everybody Can't be Like Me...During Tha Week I Make an Honest Living Working at a Firm...But At Night is When I Hit Tha Dance Floor and Twerk!
U Only Live Once, and If I Can Get a Drink or A Car...Don't Laugh, that Ferrari was Nice Too...Over a Smile or Showing Some Cleavage Then I'm More Than Willing To Show All Of My Perks.
Yeah...I Do Go To Tha Club On A Tuesday...And Yes, I'm That Gurl Who is Choosy...But I Understand Life is Short And Besides I've Been Hurt Before...Felt Like I Was Used By a Crook.
(BeepBeep) Whatever, I'm not Answering anymore Texts Until I Find My Dress...I Got To Return That Thing To Bloomy's By 1pm Today or Else I Got To Pay.
Buy "My Ex" (Fingers in Quotes)...He Did Me Wrong...Here In Miami and LA...All Tha Hot Cities, Tha Guys I Meet They Want To Control Me...Every Night...Every Day.
Telling Me "Don't Wear This" or "U Better Smile Throughout This Event"...I'm Like...Just Because U Buy Me Nice Thangs Doesn't Mean That I'm Miss Burger King or Queen...And U Can Have It Ur Way!
Especially Since I Get Guys Tossing Numbers at Me Like I'm That Florida Lotto on Tha Constant...I'm a Highly Desired Babe...U Shouldn't Seen What Happened When I Walked Into Wal-Mart Down By Cutler Bay.
Carts Crashing Into Each Other...Gurlfriends Slapping Their Men For Sneaking a Glance at Me and My Goodies...Yet...I Choose To Be With...You.
So What If U Got Money...So What If You Have These Freshman Gurls Tossing Pootie Tang At You...I'm Not Gonna Allow U Treat Me Any Kind of Way So That I'm Always Calling Mi Madre Feeling So Blue.
There's Nothing Worse Than Giving Ur All...Here's My Dress...Giving Ur All To Somebody and They Treat U Like a Number...It Wasn't Even a 7-8-6 Number...More 9-5-4...That Alone Should Make Me Sue!
Every Guy Wants Me, and Tha Guy I Finally Chose To Give My Heart To Played Me...So Every Since Then I Play Tha Field...And That's Been Since Like...August of 2002.
(Zippppp!) Ok, My Dress is Back On...Shucks...It's Backwards...My Head is Starting To Hurt, I Feel Like I Had a Hangover on Last Night.
It's Hard For Me To Find True Luv, Cuz I Feel Like Guys, and Gurls Too...If I Had Time I Tell U Bout That Too...But Guys Want Me Just Because I'm a Beautiful Sight.
Or That I Make Dreams Come True...I Mean, That's True and All, But I'm a Person Who Wants To Be Cherished For Her Mind Too and Not Cuz I Can Make Ur Rocket Soar on a Ultimate Thrill Flight.
When Ur With Me, Things Do Change, Which Is Why Guys Do Anythang For Me...People Think That I'm Only About Luxury, But There are Moments When All I Want to Do is Go Out on a Sunday and Fly a Kite.
Dress Looking Right...Heels On Point...Adjust My Bra..."Show Tha Jugs and They'll Join Tha Club"...And I'm Missing My Purse....Where's My Freakin' Purse?
When I Was in London...I Get Around Don't I...This Handsome Chap Bought This Fendi Clutch For Me...All Because I Told Him I Would Come To His Place of Rehearse.
He Was in This Rocker Band, That Was Pretty Good I Must Say, So After A Workout at Tha Third Space Gym, He Told Me That He Wanted Me 2 See Him and His Band Practice...and a Meal of Four Course.
I Was Game, and I Was In Freakin' London, And His Hair was So Fierce...I Took a Cab out To His Place, but Became Weary Cuz Outside Of Tha Studio Was a Lambo, A Fiat and a Hearst.
He Was Such a Gentleman...Introduced Me To His Friends, and I Wish I Had All My Gurls There Too, Cuz It Was Like The Met Ball Meets Wimbledon.
All Hotties...All Had That Sexy English Accent...He Stopped By Harrods and Bought Me This Fendi That I Can't Seem To Find...But All in All I Had Some UK Fun.
Of Course You Have To Let Him Get a Little Somethang, Somethang...So After a Little Late Night BBC...We Made Out With Each Other...Went To Sleep and Woke Up Like I Won.
I Mean...I Came Away With A Fendi...Had Some Fish N' Chips With Bomb Porridge For Brunch, and All This In Spite of Me Never Having To Get Down In Tha Position of a Nun!
Too Many Stories....Too Many Stories...I Need To Write a Book....(BeepBeep)...Who Is Blowing My Phone Up?!! Geez...Let Me Grab My Phone and Get Out of this Place.
U Know As I'm Walking Around Here, This Place Isn't Too Shabby...It's Clean, With a Great View...Look Over There In Tha Kitchen...I Know For Sure That That's an Expensive Piece of Vase.
I Luv Guys Who Take Care of Where They Live. I Mean Underwear on Tha Floor...Having To Step Over Pizza Boxes To Find Ur Panties...That Type of Stuff Makes a One Night Stand Actually Feel Like a Disgrace!
But When U Can Get In and Out...And...What's This on Tha Table...It's An Envelope With My Name On It...Guess I'll Open It, Already Late For Work So There's No Need To Race.
(Rippppp!) 'Hey, Just Want To Say Thanks For Last Night, U Were Really Good, and Defintitely Showed Me Why You Are Tha Best.
Here's a Little Something For a Job Well Done...XOXO'....What Tha? Bloody $400....FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS?!! Am I Some Kind of Call Gurl To This Guy...This Is Why I Need To Move 2 Tha Midwest.
All These Guys Down Here Want Nuthing But...(Sniff...Sniff)...A Good Time From Me...So What If I Look Good...(Sniff...Sniff)...There's More To Me Than Sex.
Get Urself Together...Don't Trash His House...Ur Gonna Walk Out This Door Like a Lady and Not Let Tha Ghetto Come Out of You...Left Foot...Right Foot....Left Foot...Right Foot...Open Door...U Past Tha Test.
How Do I Even Get Out Of Here? There's Tha Elevator...(OhhhOhhh...Ohhh...All I See Is Signs...All I See is Dol-lar Signs...OhhhOhhh...Ohhh...Mon-ey On My Mind...MoneyMon...) What Up Gurl.
Yes, I Know That I'm Late...Can't U Tell Him That I Was Sick or Somethang...Listen...Stop Laughing...I Don't Know If It Was Good Or Not, I Can't Remember Who Rocked Who's World.
All I Know Is That He Thought That I Was Some Latina Hooker Cuz He Left Me $400...Did I Take It? Gurl I May Have Morals But I Ain't Stupid! I'm Bout To Hit up Tha Webster On Collins for a Lil Twirl.
Huh. Just Cover For Me...U'll Figure Somethang Out...(Bing!)...Ok. Tha Elevator is Here Gal, I'll Talk 2 U Later...I Know...Maybe...Yeah, He's Cute But Still...Ok...We May Go For a Whirl.
(Door Closes)
That's My Homie There...She's gonna Look Out For Me at Work Today...She Keeps On Telling Me About This Guy Who Keeps On Talking About Me...Texting Me...But I Won't Give Him Any Kinda Time.
(Bing!) "Have a Good Day Madam." Not Sure If I Should Take That In a Polite Way or a Heidi Fleiss Kind of Way...Have A Nice Day Too Sunshine!!
Not Sure What I Should Do....(BeepBeep)...That's Him Again...See That Thang About A Guy Like This Is That U Have To Make Him Work For Me, It Can't Be a Easy Wine and Dine.
I Want To See How Bad He Wants Me...What Work Is He Willing To Put in...He Talks a Good Game But Is He Willing To Lay Everythang on Tha Line.
I Need a Taxi...So Windy Out Here...But...Some Gurls May Think I'm Playing With His Head, Which May Be True...But I'm Not Gonna Get Myself Into Anythang or Anybody Just Because.
His Track Record is Kinda Hot...South Beach Boy...Polished in Sports and Tha Arts...Luvs Fashion...Any Gurl Would Go Lady Gaga Over This Dude, but Me...No...It Takes a Whole Lot More than a little Cyberspace Buzz.
U Know What's Funny...I Ignore Him...Then I Give Him a Tease, like a Photo Of What It is Like To Be With Me...He Likes Curvy Gurls So I Give Him My Finest Tricks Like Nobody Else Does.
Yes, I've Stalked Him on Instagram...Taken a Peek at Where's He's at ...Guess I Kinda Like Getting Attention From a Guy Like Him...Just Careful of Luv...Cuz When Luv Rains...It Truly Floods.
My Gurls Have Told Me That He's Written About Me Soooo Much Recently...Stating How He Hates Me, Cuz I Go To All These Other Celebrities, and Athletes, but Fail 2 See Tha Me and His Chemistry.
I Think He's About To Give Up...Which I Don't Want...But I Grew Up in a Strong Latin Household...And How I Was Raised, Us Women Never Chase Tha Guys...Tha Guy Must ALWAYS Come 2 Me.
TAXI!! TAXI!! I Should've Used Uber...But After So Many Breakups and One Nighters...Perhaps My Gurl is Right, I Should Give Him a Chance...Maybe I Should Settle Down, I Mean I Am...33.
Just Not Sure If I Want To Have a Baby...He's Such an Indiana Boy...I Don't even Know Where That's At...But I Do Think He's Gonna Want To Have a Little Star Baby.
Then He's Talking About Moving To LA in Tha Future...Not Sure About That...Most of My Family is In South America, but Tha Flights Across Tha Globe May Be Too Much.
I'm Thinking Too Much Ahead...My Bounce Back Body....Leaving my Family...I Need To Just Breathe and let Luv Decide it All...And Not Be In Such a Rush.
No Other Guy Keeps Coming After Me Like He Does Though...From Sending Me Flowers...To Hand Written Notes Sent Through My Twin Brother Destino...He Wants Me Bad...It's More Than a Crush.
Why Not Right? Guess Today is His Lucky Day, Or Maybe I'm Talking Crazy Since It's Taking Forever To Catch a Cab...And I Just Realized That Up In That Guy's Condo I Think I Left My Brush.
Call or Text? Call or Text?....He Wants a Fearless Gurl, but I Don't Want To Come on Too Strong...Maybe I Should Just Wait.
I Know He's One of Tha Last of His Kind on Earth, That's For Sure...Somethang is Telling Me That Once I Make This Call, It's Gonna Lead To More Than Just One Date.
Ok...Relax...I Can Do This...He's Sent Me Text Messages All Day So Far...He's Already Told His Homeboys That Once We Finally Hook Up...U Can Begin 2 Place Orders For Tha Wedding Cake.
After Years of Denying Myself....I've Finally Decided To Give In and Give Him a Try....
(Rinnnggg! Ringggg!)...
Hey Austino Galaxia!...This Is...U Know Who This Is...
Yeah...Ur Right....
It's Fate.
With Kisses!
Galaxia!
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